Divorce – Destruction of the family and thus of the individual and society – A psychological Abortion

With the divorce, the family is destroyed and thus the role of father and mother is destroyed. Only physical children's cases remain. Divorce is tantamount to a psychological abortion. The biggest misconception of modernity is that we think being a father and mother is independent of being a husband and being a wife. We are sons and daughters for life. And we show the children how to be husband and wife.

Divorce

I am more important than the family, I am more important than the children, I am more important than you! No matter what the excuses and explanations, this is what the children are shown. The seed of narcissism is planted in children and bears fruit in adulthood. The blossoms are the inability to sacrifice and take responsibility for others or for a cause. Inferiority complexes and destructive self-doubt are the consequences of divorce in children. Children get stuck in psychological development and cannot make clear decisions. Confused and aimless.

Criteria for choosing a partner - For whom and what do you choose a spouse? Psychological Abortion

But why is the role of parent inseparable from the role of husband and wife? You choose your wife as a potential mother and your husband as a potential father to your children! For the family, not for yourself! This is the decisive criterion when choosing a spouse. The decision to start a family is one of the most important decisions in life. Because you take on a lifelong responsibility for other people. The wife must be willing to die for her husband because she bears the children.

Childbearing is an existential process. Before marriage, the man must have faced death face to face, because only then will he know what life and responsibility mean. Then he is ready to die for the family. This is what the spouses promise each other and have decided to do. With the divorce you have decided that you have made an existential mistake (sin) in choosing a spouse. This is especially true for the women, for the women are the ones who choose (by luring). The men can only present themselves.

 

In Case of Death

When a parent dies, the consequences are not as serious as divorce, because the disintegration of the unit (family) did not result from a personal decision.

Divorce

Divorce is an existential conflict. Both have lost confidence in their own ability to judge. You made the wrong decision. The woman who chose and the man who wanted the woman need to scrutinize and recalibrate their own judgment. But since starting a family was an existential decision, one's own life and death is now being completely questioned. Rightly so, one's discernment must now be accurately and carefully restored. The most important decision was wrongly decided. This shakes the whole human being in his soul.

Divorce - Children - Narcissists

With the children, the unity of parents and family is now falling apart and they no longer know where they belong. Divorce is tantamount to a psychological abortion. Because of a personal decision, the family (children) is no longer important, but that of the person who initiated the divorce. The children inevitably become narcissists. Divorce teaches children that it's more important to look out for yourself than for others. What was lived and not what was said is crucial!

That is why the family is sacred and a covenant for life

The shadows have been falling for a longer time, through the cool evening air, Joseph from the cleft walks towards the forest over quiet meadows. Leads the donkey faithfully by the bridle, gentle breezes hardly fan, 'The angels are iron wings, which the little child sees in dreams. And Mary looks down on the child full of joy and sorrow, sings lullabies in her heart in the quiet solitude. The St. John Worms are circling, diligently shining across the path, wanting to show the Mother of God every footbridge through the wilderness.

And a sweet shudder runs through the grass, it touches the hem of her cloak. Brooklet now lets his chatter go, and the woods scarcely whisper, lest they betray the flight. The little child raised his hand, since they did him so kind things, blessed the quiet land, so that the earth with flowers and trees must continue to dream of heaven at night in eternity - oh blessed time!

 

Family Counseling with Zen Master Father Reding